Separation is something that most people have to go through at least once in their life. Unfortunately, it happens that after some time in the relationship, people realize they do not see a future together with their person. Even though they truly love their significant other. Sometimes couples have different visions of life organization and this may not come out early in the relationship. However, the most unpleasant reason for parting is any kind of violence, which in the long run can lead to psychological dependence on a partner. Separation is a painful loss anyways and you just have to go through it properly. The famous psychologist from New York City, Karen Weinstein, shared how to quickly and easily get over a breakup. Read more at newyorka.
How to forget a former partner?
Karen Weinstein is a clinical psychologist who has been working with clients in New York and other big cities in the US since 1998. Karen also teaches at the School of Medicine of the University of California. Over the years of experience working with clients who are often famous people, Karen Weinstein knows everything about successful relationships with partners and with yourself. First of all, the secret of personal happiness lies in acknowledging the problem and long hours of work on yourself.
Karen Weinstein said that most people make the same mistake after a breakup. They begin to idealize their exes and constantly replay all the best memories with them. All this simply drives a person to a dead end of pain and despair. It is very difficult to get out of such a state. The New York psychologist advises you to give yourself some time to pass through the pain and then analyze past relationships. It is essential to take a practical view of the situation and focus on what was wrong in the past relationship and why you decided to leave it. It is clear that they were not terrible and joyless, but the negative moments outweighed the positive ones.
Weinstein also suggests making a list of annoying things that bothered you during the relationship. It will help distinguish the key point and make you realize that your decision to leave your ex was the right one.
The best option would be not to live through your emotions and feelings alone but to share them with a close person. Firstly, you will get the support you need. Secondly, it is more obvious to the person from a distance to see the shortcoming of your past relationship and point you in the right direction. The main thing is to tell your feelings to someone you really trust.
Karen on how not to lose yourself after a breakup
Many people, after separation from a beloved one, are used to running away from their pain. That is good if it is a hobby or a job and not a new relationship, alcohol, uncontrolled shopping or eating through the problem. Karen Weinstein emphasizes that such emotional outbursts can be too dangerous, which is why you should not follow your impulsive feelings. Certainly, it seems to us, this is a great way to overcome a hard period but this is a deceptive feeling. It will be even more difficult to break from the past so quickly.
Weinstein also does not recommend making radical changes in appearance immediately after parting. Such decisions should be made in a calm state. Therefore, it is better to change the image a little later when the painful feelings are gone.
It is important to realize that your ex-partner does not have to be your enemy. Especially if you have children in common. Of course, not everyone can stay friends after divorce. Nevertheless, living with a feeling of hatred and deep resentment toward your exes can harm you in the first place. If you experience something similar and do not know how to deal with such emotions, you should consult a specialist.
Once you start feeling better, Karen advises you not to give up on the joys of life. Go on dates, develop yourself, find a new hobby and focus on your happiness. Give yourself a chance to start life with a clean slate.